Superfluous Nipples

P.E. at school, I hated it. It was the worst lesson ever and I hated it with a passion! I was skinny and I smoked, so the thought of running or exerting myself just seemed like a waste of time, 'I'm skinny! Why do I need excersise??'. Plus the shouts of 'Lauren, if you miss this shot I am gonna lamp ya after school!' didn't help to encourage my enthusiasm. I did, however, enjoy skiving off P.E. or forging a letter from my mom: 'Lauren has a stomach ache today so she can't take part in netball/basketball/swimming' - delete here.

Our school has a swimming pool, which is pretty cool, unless you are a 12-16 year old with body issues and annoying boys shouting comments at you like 'no tits' or 'flat' (yeah, not very imaginative, those boys). So, needless to say, swimming lessons were a horrifying prospect and I would do anything to get out of it. Skiving on school grounds, outside the grounds, in the changing rooms, even just sitting out the lesson was better than taking part!

Cross country was another crappy activity that we were forced to do. Especially because in England it rains more often than a fat kid eats a bag of crisps. To be honest, we mostly just walked it and had a quick ciggie on the way round and yes we were always last. My shoe got properly stuck in a mud squelch once, it was horrible because my shoe was in a sinkhole and my foot was just dangling there in a pure white sock, and I couldnt move or get free. I ended up covered head to toe in mud then the teacher was annoyed because I was nearly last, I wonder what the ones behind me were doin then??

We did have some good lessons though, outdoor tennis. The only reason they were good though was because we used to fight each other with tennis rackets, and I don't mean playfight, I mean properly smacking girls that I didn't like really hard. Those were the good old days... I remember once this girl who always annoyed me was being particularly annoying, so I caught her around the face with a whistle. I do regret it but she was just annoying the crap out of me!

Now the changing rooms are another matter alltogether... They were the place where arguements started and finished, girls judged each other on the size of their boobs, fights were planned for after school and your money and valubles were never safe. I remember that someone once went into my coat pocket, took my money and my last ciggie, now that was just uncalled for!

A girl came up to me once in the changing rooms when we were alone and told me she had a third nipple. I was like, 'ok...' so I asked her if I could see it, I was quite excited because I thought it would be like another nipple or boob like in total recall.... And it was inbetween the other two boobs, but to be honest I was dissapointed because it just looked like a spot or a wart or something. Oh well, maybe that's just a nickname; there aren't any real third nipples it's just a name for a bibble of skin that sort of resembles a nipple because it's by the boobs.

Well, if anyone would like to comment on this post please do and I will be back with more interesting (or not) stories.